A dildo is any phallic object that is inserted into the vagina or anus to produce pleasure. There are several different types of dildos, and users should know how to use them correctly and how to take care of them. Remember that anyone can use a dildo for both vaginal or anal stimulation, and your sexual activity is not a basis for one’s sexual orientation. Unlike the vagina, the anus is not biologically designed to be penetrated by any object; thus, it is essential that you use adequate lubrication if you attempt to use a dildo in anal play. Some dildos are specifically designed for anal play, so one might consider a toy such as a butt plug, which has a wider base to prevent the object from being lost inside of an orifice. In addition, for women there are many more nerves in the clitoris than in the walls of the vagina. If dildo penetration does not provide enough stimulation, a woman might want look to the vibrator section below to learn how to better stimulate the clitoris for their desired pleasure.

Dildos come in all sorts of shapes and sizes. You may want to experiment to discover which of these sex toys, if any, is right for you. Traditional dildos are usually made out of rubber; these dildos are simply designed to be inserted into an orifice and gripped at the base. Some traditional dildos also double as vibrators. Some of these dildos are designed to look like realistic men’s penises. Some have testicles at the base of the dildo, and a few of the fancier models can produce liquid, modeling ejaculate to further the similarities. Sometimes porn stars sell exact molded replicas of their penises. There are even kits to create a dildo molded from your own penis, which might be a fun activity for couples looking to further explore their sexuality.

Other traditional dildos are specially designed to be curved or double pronged so that women may stimulate their G-spot in the vagina or so that men may stimulate their prostate gland rectally. These toys might also have a special vibrating option that can be positioned against the clitoris in females or the prostate in males. Some dildos are even double sided so that partners can both be penetrated simultaneously.

Decorative Dildos

There are many dildos designed to look beautiful in order to reflect the beauty of sexuality and love; however, these are not often as functional as traditional dildos. Decorative dildos are often made of glass, which requires a great deal of consideration and care before any use. First, glass is cold and may not be very pleasurable. Secondly, glass can be made slippery from lube or vaginal fluid, making the toy difficult to hold on to and easier to lose inside of one’s body. Lastly, glass can break, and broken glass in the vagina or anus is extremely painful and might require medical attention.

Strap-on Dildos

Some dildos are specially designed to be strapped onto a person’s body or head. Above you can see a harness that would attach to a dildo. Strap–on dildos can be utilized for an exciting role reversal from traditional penile/vaginal sex. When a female partner penetrates her male partner anally with a strap on, it is called “pegging.” Many heterosexual men are afraid to engage in pegging because of the stigma of anal sex. However, we would like to stress that one’s sexual orientation is not determined by sexual activity but rather one’s attraction to a particular gender or identity. Being open to the experience of pegging can even be thought of as a sign of strength for heterosexual men who are confident in their sexuality and comfortable in a non-traditional sexual relationship. Individuals who are “pegged” by their partner might find that they enjoy the sensation of penetration and prostate stimulation, which can make orgasms more intense.

Anal Plugs
These toys are similar to dildos; however, they are specifically designed for anal play. Some anal plugs double as vibrators, which might increase their appeal as a stimulating toy. Anal plugs are often used to help stretch the anus, in turn making anal intercourse easier. Anal plugs can be purchased in sets that provide various sizing options. Prior to using one of these toys, we recommend using the restroom and thoroughly cleaning the anus including about one inch inside. To make the process of insertion easier, be generous with the amount of lubrication you use.

Unlike some dildos, butt plugs have a wider base to prevent the toy from being fully inserted into the anus. If an object is fully inserted in the anus, the muscle that surround the rectal opening, called the anal sphincter, involuntarily closes and traps the foreign object in the anus. This can be painful, frustrating, and costly if you need to go to a doctor to have the foreign object removed from your anus. It can also be very dangerous. Do not assume that something is too long to become trapped inside the anus.

Vibrators
Vibrators come in a diverse number of shapes and sizes. They are often sold commercially as “personal massagers.” Depending on the vibrator, it might be optimized for vaginal, penile, or anal stimulation. Vibrators are especially effective at providing clitoral stimulation. Like dildos, vibrators come in a variety of materials. Hard plastic vibrators are rigid, are appropriate for internal and external stimulation, and provide more intense stimulation than soft vibrators. Soft vibrators can be made from rubber, silicone, or even realistic skin and provide less intense stimulation.

In today’s technologically advanced world, vibrators have developed drastically. Many of the vibrators sold today offer different options for varying intensities of vibrations. Sometimes a vibrator can be paired with a smartphone to be controlled remotely or even be synced with music. These new capabilities can allow for exciting and novel experiences for an individual or a couple’s pleasure.

When cleaning a vibrator take caution with any batteries or electrical sources. Many vibrators are water safe; however, some might not be. Be aware of the specific toy you have and look to the manufacturer’s instructions for cleaning and maintenance.

Vibrator Tips

Vibrators are fun for almost everyone, but are especially popular among women. Using a vibrator clitorally is among the easiest ways for most women to reach orgasm, with oral sex and water stimulation high on the list too. Here are some basic tips for getting the most out of a vibrator:

If a woman feels comfortable making a little noise, then she’ll probably find that letting herself moan or sigh while exhaling will improve the whole experience. Moving or rocking her hips rhythmically, in time with her breathing, can also make a big difference.

If the vibrations are the right speed but seem too intense, then a woman might try either draping a thin cloth between her clitoris and the vibrator or leaving a light article of clothing on. She can also try moving the vibrator to the side of the clitoris rather than keeping it directly on the clitoris.

Rather than keeping the vibrator stationary and using heavy pressure, a woman can try using lighter pressure but moving the head of the vibrator back and forth in circles.

If a woman is already comfortable moving her hips in time with her breathing, she can try squeezing and relaxing her PC muscle (the same muscle she squeezes to stop the flow of urine when she’s urinating) in time with her pelvic movements.

Some women find they can have multiple clitoral orgasms with their vibrator. The secret is to back off on the pressure, keep the vibrator moving, and avoid direct contact with the clitoris until the sexual arousal builds up again.

Men can enjoy vibrators too. For men with female partners, one obvious approach is for his partner to use a vibrator on her clitoris during intercourse with him. The vibrations reverberate onto his penis, a sensation which some men really enjoy. Men can also enjoy vibrators without a partner. This is a fundamentally different experience than masturbating with the hand, as (chances are) his penis will be semi-hard through much or all of the experience rather than fully erect. However, men who practice rhythmic breathing, pelvis rocking, and PC muscle contractions may find that they like the sensation. Some men find they can reach pleasurable orgasms with a vibrator without ever having a full erection.

Anal Beads

As pictured, anal beads are a series of beads on a “string” in ascending sizes. They are intended to be inserted into the anus slowly, one at a time. At a time of significant arousal, or when one is nearing orgasm, a person or their partner should remove the beads from the anus one by one. One should not pull out the beads too quickly and should discuss with their partner what speed provides the best sensations. It is often said that the insertion of anal beads is not what feels pleasurable but rather their removal. These toys come in a variety of materials and should be soft and flexible. Especially given that they are an anal toy, it is essential that one appropriately clean the beads after every use. Discuss with your partner beforehand if you decide you would like to incorporate anal beads into your time together.

Ben Wa Balls
Ben Wa balls are similar to anal beads but are primarily intended for vaginal stimulation. The pair of balls are often connected by a string or are sometimes magnetized. In general, one ball is usually weighted differently than the other. The pair of balls should be lubricated prior to being inserted into the vagina. After their insertion, it is recommended that the individual sit in a rocking chair or a swing; even performing Kegal exercises will cause the balls to move inside the vagina. This motion from within can provide pleasure to the individual. At first, the balls might fall out with too much activity, but with practice the user should be able to keep them in for longer durations. With some practice and confidence, individuals might use the Ben Wa balls while in public, often without anyone else’s awareness.

Cock Rings
Cock rings come in a variety of sizes and materials, often metal or flexible elastic. It is recommended that first-time users try more flexible rings before moving on to metal or more rigid materials. The rings are used by being placed at the base of the penis or, for greater sensation, behind the testicles as well. Cock rings are most easily put in place while the penis is flaccid; using appropriate lubrication also helps to make the experience more comfortable. Cock rings work by restricting blood flood, thus providing the ability to last longer during intercourse and with a stronger erection. In addition, cock rings provide greater sensation and more intense orgasms to individuals who use them.

The Artificial Orifice
Often sold commercially as the “Fleshlight” or “Fleshjack,” these toys have a hard plastic outer cylinder with an internal portion that is usually modeled off of a body orifice. The various inserts are generally made from realistic, skin-like material, making the experience of using one very similar to real penetration of some variety. Individuals can insert their penis into these toys to masturbate by themselves, or a partner can participate to add to the experience. This material is porous; thus, it is essential that you either use a condom or appropriately clean the toy with antibacterial soap, as well as an additional cleansing powder such as corn starch.

This toy is very versatile and can be used in a number of different positions. One can move the toy along the length of the penis as in traditional masturbation, or they could position the device so that they are able to thrust into it as in missionary position. Some brands sell alternate attachments such as wall mounts or suction cups.7 For those who choose to invest in these toys, this could be an exciting way to improve the overall pleasure and experience.

Sex Dolls
In making the experience of using toys even closer to reality, people have developed sex dolls with which individuals can have sex. In general, they come in two different varieties: blow-up dolls and realistic sex dolls. https://www.yourdoll.com/

Blow-up sex dolls can be more basic while others are more realistic and complex. The simpler blow-up sex dolls often do not incorporate any masturbators but rather have holes in the appropriate locations. These dolls are a good beginner option for individuals who already own masturbators such as a dildo or the insert piece of a “Fleshlight” that can be inserted into the dolls. Other more realistic blow-up dolls might come with masturbators or vibrating functions for added pleasure. Dolls vary in the experience; some might even talk, suck, or secrete lubricant.8

Hyper-realistic sex dolls can be extremely expensive but might be a worthwhile investment if it is what one truly wants. Usually such dolls are sturdier and designed to feel and look more like a person; however, one can purchase only parts of said dolls, such as the torso. These dolls are a much greater commitment and not just financially. They require extensive cleaning with soap and water and a dusting of corn starch. In addition, they require space for storage and can be incredibly heavy.8 Despite these downsides, realistic sex dolls provide intense and accurate sexual stimulation.

Concluding Remarks
These are just a few of the extensive variety of sex toys sold commercially. Sex toys offer an exciting and satisfying new way to experience sexual stimulation by yourself or with a partner. We recommend trying out a couple of toys before deciding which ones work best for you. There is no reason to feel embarrassed in purchasing a sex toy. While sex toys can be viewed as an extra cost, they are an investment in your own sexual satisfaction.